Thursday, May 8, 2008

What I learned at Traffic School

April 15th or so I was headed to a doc apt as a follow up for my tumor deal... I was not late. I was not hurrying. I was enjoying the onslaught of questions from my 3.5ish year old daughter. I lie, I was getting frustrated. Anyway. Unbeknown to me at the time the speed limit on the road was 30. I am the kind of person who is motivated by guilt, among other things. If I had known I was speeding, I would not have been. Either way, there I was apparently going 43mph according to the fake-name officer who pulled me over. Ok, it might be his real name and who am I to judge, but seriously... Shaw Hammer? At first when he said his name I thought he said Officer Chalmers.

Ok so I see the stealth blue mustang cop lights flip on and immediately pull over, there was no one else on the road so it must be me... (also probably why I was going the speed I was, not to mention the fact that I am 100 yards or less from getting on the freeway). I have never been pulled over, and never got a ticket obviously. So, here I am waiting in the van answering my daughter's questions about, Why are we not going? Why is the man talking to you mommy? Because mommy was driving to fast. Why were you going so fast? I didn't know I was going so fast, Mommy made a mistake. But why Mommy? I don't know. Probably because you keep asking questions. I have 5-14 days to get it taken care of right, but we were leaving on a business trip and then directly to our vacation on day 4. Anyway I will leave out all the head ache details, we did get it squared away and I went to traffic school after our vacation. Thursday the 8th.

  • I learned that I SHOULD be HAPPY I got a ticket in AF rather than say Lehi or Pleasant Grove because the traffic school admission is taken out of your ticket cost, not added to it.
  • AF has TRAFFIC COPS whose sole purpose is to write tickets. They don't do regular loving, and helpful ;) cop work. According to my sister, they are called Pricks. :)
  • We are all speeders
  • If you have been to traffic school and the cop asks you next time you get pulled over and you say no ("if you lie" according to the Officer), you can go again (if he gives you that option). A kid in the class had been six times in at least the last six months. Technically, I guess you are only supposed to be able to go 2 times in 2 years.
  • We come in all shapes and sizes. There were at least 32 of us. From 16, girl, boy, 55, punk, housewife, Princess, Dad, etc.
  • The officer running the class didn't want to be there... so don't tell, but we got out early.
  • It's a good place to run into old friends. :) I got to chat with a friend from the ward we were in when we first were married.
  • The strict guidelines listed on the attendance info sheet is not followed by them, so why should it be by us. We were all congregated around the entrance and the doors weren't even open, (it says doors lock promptly at 6pm so don't be late) for us to be locked out of. The officer even let a guy in late. We didn't really need our licenses. People brought in their electronic devices and purses and no one's head or hand was severed.
  • It was actually kinda enjoyable. hmmm that is weird. The officer was friendly and upbeat, he just answered our questions and gave us pointers on where the "speed traps" were. I should have taken notes, oh wait not pencil or paper allowed, well then mental notes.
  • Watch out for Blue Mustangs. They are only there to write a ticket. (I figured this one was worth repeating in various forms).
Do I want to go again? No. It is a 45 minute drive for me. A waste of gas and Gary and the kids went on a bike ride with out me.


  1. That bites. A hit on the record too :( Well at least you got to catch up with an old friend :)

  2. I hate traffic school. I had to go just about 4 years ago. In Logan. It sucked. experience was similar; bumped into a handful of people I knew, etc. Not horrible, but not exactly cheap either. And I was lucky...I didn't get a ticket...just had to go to traffic school instead. What a waste of time (and money).

    This post made me giggle. I sure like you, Coretta.